Focus on the Good Stuff: The Power of Appreciation

"Have you ever had something taken away from you only to realize how much you appreciated it after it was gone?

I often ask this question from friends and colleagues.

Most of us have taken someone or something for granted. We only truly realized how much that person or situation meant to us after the fact.

We often waste way too much of our time and energy focusing on what we don’t like, what we’re worried about, or what we think needs to be fixed, changed, or enhanced. We live in a culture obsessed with “bad stuff.” Just turn on the news, listen to the conversations and negative attitudes of the people around you, or pay attention to the thoughts in your own head.

The Power of Appreciation in Your Life

What if we stopped this negative obsession and started paying attention to what and whom we appreciate, right now?

Imagine how this simple but profound shift could transform our lives, our families, our relationships, our results, our work groups, our communities, and more. Our experience is a function of what we focus on. Each and every moment we have a choice about where we place our attention.

I am not advocating that we deny, avoid, or run from the challenges, issues, or even the pain in our lives or around us. It’s important that we’re able to confront, face, and deal with these difficulties. However, we don’t have to obsess about the bad stuff and let it run us. We each can consciously choose to focus on the good stuff in our lives, with others, and most importantly towards ourselves.

There are great things happening in your life and around you all the time - if you choose to look for them.

Five Principles for Living a Life Filled With Appreciation

1) Be Grateful – Focus on the many blessings in your life and all that you have to be thankful for.

2) Choose Positive Thoughts and Feelings – Make a conscious decision to transform your negative thoughts and feelings into ones that empower you.

3) Use Positive Words – Pay attention to the words you use with others, about things, and in speaking about yourself. Speak with the most positive words possible. Our words have the power to create, not just describe.

4) Acknowledge Others – Focus on what you appreciate about the people around you and let them know. Be genuine and let others know the positive impact they have on you and your life.

5) Appreciate Yourself – Celebrate who you are, what you do, and the many gifts and talents you have. Self-appreciation is not arrogance; it’s an awareness of your own power and the key to self-confidence, success, and fulfillment.

When we truly focus on this good stuff, our world transforms and we are able to see and experience the GREAT FULLNESS of our lives.

We don’t have to wait until everything is handled. We don’t have to wait until we get it all perfect. And, we don’t have to wait for people to do things exactly as we want them to. We can start appreciating life, others, and ourselves exactly as we are, right now.

Don’t wait ‘til it’s too late!

Manifest Your Desires by Letting Go.

The first thing we learn about how to manifest reality is the value of focusing our emotions and the images we hold in our mind. It's critical, we are told, to focus vividly on exactly what we want and hold this intention both faithfully and joyfully at all times.

This is an accurate explanation of how to get started. But the fact is sometimes manifesting your desires has more to do with letting go and releasing your attachment.

It took me quite a while to figure this out. Looking back I had read about this important part of the process many times, but it hadn't appealed to my ego and therefore I failed to give it proper attention.

While our starting point in the manifestation process is focusing our whole being on our intentions, too much intensity will actually derail our efforts. Remember the law of attraction works by virtue of the vibrations we are holding in the moment.

If you constantly and with great fervor focus your thoughts, feelings, physical energy, and visual faculties on things you want, it's likely you will be paying attention to what is missing form your life at this time. For example, thinking about the money you desire 24 hours a day is sure to trigger thoughts of lack and images of yourself currently being without this specific amount of money.

Your acknowledgment of lack, coupled with the intense emotions and projection of deliberate manifestation exercises, can be a recipe for attracting more lack.

This is not easy to accept. In fact it's a little bit outrageous if we're being blunt.

But it's critical to your success that you understand the fine line between intentional manifestation and counterproductive obsession. I won't pretend to understand every nuance and fine point involved in the process of creation (nor should anyone else!) but experience has taught me that remaining somewhat detached from my desires is the most effective approach.

By living in the present moment, allowing your natural happiness to emerge, and believing in your desires with relaxed confidence, you create the vibration that will attract or manifest the things you seek. Whereas becoming consumed by your desire tends to slow or completely defeat the manifestation process.

The best advice I can give you is to remain relaxed and focus on having fun. Enjoy the process of visualizing, affirming, and believing but do not allow these activities to dominate your life.

Humanity has a long way to travel before we can understand fully all the mysteries of universal intelligence. Perhaps one day we'll have access to specific metaphysical knowledge that allows us to work with virtual reality models during the process of manifestation; but in the meantime we must trust our intuitive guidance systems.

And if you listen both your intuition and your emotions will tell you that letting go is the true key to realizing your destiny. It's more than fine to want the things you want, just don't allow your ego to dominate you and lead you down the path of obsession.

In summary: Know what you want and intend it vividly; then relax and live your life in the present moment, happy with what you have and content in the belief that great things are on the way to you.

The Leader Next Door Needs Written Goals.

You're the leader next door and have heard over and over that you need to set goals and write them down. You sit down in front of the computer to make a list of what development you want to take place in your followers. Maybe you are a manager and they are your sales staff in an office. Your list includes all the things you want them to be aware of as well as all the things you want them to know and appreciate.

One goal may look something like this: "The members of my team shall learn appreciate the value of my organization's training system". There is nothing wrong with this type of goal, but there's nothing really right about it. What do you need to do?

Fuzzy Goals

The above example is something that is referred to as a fuzzy goal. It is abstract and refers to an internal condition in the mind and emotions of the team member. How can the leader next door know when it has been accomplished? How do you measure how aware they are?

Goals like these are called "fuzzy goals". They are not measurable. Neither you nor your follower will be able to say when or if they were successful. If your goals are fuzzy, you should do more analysis to determine what it is you really want from your followers.

Write down your fuzzy goal as a start of the analysis process and only look at one at a time. Don't waste time criticizing what you've already written. Instead, make sure your statements are clear. (A goal may consist of two or three sentences.) Ask yourself, "What do I want them to do?"

Make the statements very specific. Avoid forms of "to be" as they weaken the goal statement. For example instead of saying, "I want them to be courteous when they greet people." Try sentences like, "I want them to smile, shake, hands, and give a positive affirmation when they greet people." Do you see the difference? You can measure the latter.

When you get done rewriting, ask yourself, will I be satisfied that they are successful if they do this. The purpose behind developmental goals should always be the success of the person being developed. Do this and you will have goals that are concrete and measurable.

Four components of a well-written goal

As the leader next door, you will want to write goals that are complete and well written. Four things need to take place: The goal should describe the follower; it should describe the tools that the follower will have to learn and perform the activity; it should describe the context in which the follower will use it; and it should describe clearly what the follower will do.

Try this with a goal or two that you already have in the back of your mind. You'll be amazed at the clarity it brings. It will create a revolution in your leadership goal setting effectiveness.

Tips to Embrace Change.

Successful people embrace change. They understand that everything around them changes, all of the time and they adapt accordingly. Although change can be exciting, it can also be fearful and a bit overwhelming. When change happens you have two choices: Accept it or resist it. The choice is yours. What is stopping you from reaching for that brass ring?

If you chose to resist change, you most likely have done so because of fear. Fear can be an immobilizing emotion and if not managed correctly, can rob you of many opportunities and from creating and enjoying an abundant life. There is an acronym for F.E.A.R - False Evidence Appearing Real. We create false evidence in our minds to justify our decision not to move forward. We also become so overwhelmed with fear, that we lose focus and lose sight of what is really important to us and this single factor, can keep us in our current situations and living our lives in its current state. If you want to overcome your fear, here are some final words of wisdom and tips that have worked for me:

1)Everyone fears something.

Nobody is invincible. Everyone has encountered fear at one time or another, even the most successful people in the world so you are not alone and can get through it as many before you have.

2)Take small steps

Break down your action into smaller actions that you build upon. For example, if you are scheduled to give a presentation to a large group but are fearful, try talking with smaller groups. If you are trying to exercise, try walking around the block. You do not have to run that marathon right now if you are afraid, but you do need to look for continual improvement and take action towards your goal.

3)Nobody is paying attention to you.

So many times, we fear embarrassment or not being accepted by others. In the top ten fears of humans, Public Speaking holds the number 1 spot, while death holds number 5. Meaning, people would rather end their life rather than not be accepted by a group. The truth is, nobody is paying attention to you and you need to be confident in who you are and worry less about what other people think.

4)Staying positive, motivated and focused.

One of the most powerful weapons in your arsenal is a healthy mind. Remind yourself each day why you want to achieve your goals, what positive changes will come to your life and remain on target. You must never lose sight of your target and where you want to go and more importantly, the why.

5)Accept failure as part of change

Things do not always go our way. We will fail. It is not the failure that we should be focused on but what we learned from that failure so we do not repeat again. By changing your mindset to look at failure as an opportunity to grow and to learn, you will create the behaviors to support taking the next action to move you closer to your goal.

6)Embrace a live in the moment attitude.

Focus your energy in the moment. Do not dwell in the past or constantly dream about the future. You have a life going on right now - embrace the moment. Be completely present and engaged in what is going on right now - your conversations, your relationships, your career, everything. Appreciate what you have and focus on making the changes you need to right now in this moment!

7) Allow change to happen.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over the same way expecting different results. The only way you and your life are going to change is to let change happen. Transform, be free and embrace every opportunity as a positive experience.

8) Do what makes you happy!

For your goals to work, they must be personal and you must have an emotional connection to the result. You own your own life so do what makes you happy. Not what you think others want from you. If the people in your life truly love you, they will support you in decisions and I guarantee you they want you to be happy.

If you chose to accept change, you are in for the ride of your lifetime! Your life is going to change and since you are in complete control of your choices, you life will be all you desire. In Stephen Covey's "7 Habits of Highly Effective People, he discusses being aware of the things you can control in life and the things that you cannot control. Knowing this difference is critical in accepting change.

About Ondo State: MIMIKO AND THE LIFE CHANGING 3I’S INITIATIVE

About Ondo State: MIMIKO AND THE LIFE CHANGING 3I’S INITIATIVE: The Minister for National Planning, Dr Shamsudeen Usman did not mince words when after a visit to Ondo state, he adjudged it the pace-se...

About Ondo State: Ondo: Turning challenges to opportunities

About Ondo State: Ondo: Turning challenges to opportunities: ONDO State under the incumbent Governor is turning out to be a key player in the economy of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. In its comm...

Leading From Within.

Much like the lighthouse that provides guidance and direction for sea-bearing vessels, leaders must become the beacon of light in their own lives before they can effectively lead others.

As we have come to learn, true leadership is not about a title or a position in an organization. Nor is it about a person's genetic make-up, level of education or socio-economic status. Leadership is a way of being. Effective leaders are those who lead by a set of core values that reflect who they want to be in the world as well as the contribution that they want to make. These leaders show up in all endeavors as the same person guided by the same principles. They lead with integrity, passion and an unresolved commitment to making a difference in the lives of those they touch. This to me is truly leading from within. As author Kevin Cashman says in his book, Leadership From The Inside Out, "Who we are says as much about us as a leader as the act of leading itself."

The following steps are critical in leading from within:

1. Define It!
Leaders need to first identify their core values, purpose and personal leadership visions. These three components together form the road map which guide and direct leaders on a daily basis and in all facets of their lives. Once identified, leaders can then transform these foundational principles into their values, purpose and leadership visions at work.

2. Get Behind It!
The next step involves creating accountability and support around these important principles. To do this, it is critical for leaders to share their values, purpose and visions with those around them, whether at work or at home. By enrolling people in this process, leaders are able to not only create a support system for themselves, but also create a feedback loop that empowers people to let them know when they have gotten away from their visions.

3. Exemplify It!
It is vitally important for leaders' everyday actions to be in alignment with their values, purpose and personal leadership vision. Being inconsistent or "ho hum" about their vision will very quickly sabotage any previous efforts made towards self-improvement. Inconsistency can also breed distrust, both internally and externally. Therefore, it is of the utmost importance for leaders to consistently show up as the person they have declared themselves to be.

4. Learn From It!
Leadership development is an ongoing process that involves a continuous improvement plan. Continuous improvement could involve seeking out feedback on a regular basis or taking skill-based classes and workshops. Leaders need to revisit their personal leadership vision bi-annually and make any necessary revisions. The point is that continuous improvement is a never-ending component of personal leadership. Remember, when leaders stop learning, they also stop growing.

5. Refine It!
Finally, leaders must hold themselves accountable. Since actions speak louder than words, it is essential for leaders to continually assess and reassess how they are showing up in the world to make sure they are in alignment with who they say they are.

Love and leadership

“I would far rather have a business led by love than by fear”. – Herb Kelleher, Southwest Airlines

“…Whether it is better to be loved or feared? The answer is that one would like to be both; but because it is difficult to combine them, it is far better to be feared than loved.” – Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince

“It might sound slightly bizarre,” says Ken Blanchard, co-author of The One Minute Manager, “but one of the key beliefs for effective leadership is to be madly in love with all the people you are leading.” Well, you are right Ken. It does sound slightly bizarre. For many managers, leadership is the love that dare not speak its name.

Having said that, a surprising number of hard-nosed leaders are unafraid to talk about love as being fundamental to leadership. Rudy Giuliani, the former Mayor of New York, tells us there are three keys to leadership:

1. If you are going to lead, be optimistic. If you're not, you're followers can hardly be expected to be.
2. If you don't love people, do something else.
3. Be absolutely clear what you stand for. (1)

Love is…

A definition would help ease any discomfort you might be feeling. Tim Collins, a career soldier, rose to prominence when an impromptu speech he gave to the Irish regiment he commanded in Iraq ended up in newspapers all over the world. Collins says, like Kelleher, Giuliani and Blanchard, that “to lead effectively, you have to love people”. Collins goes on to explain ‘love’ as knowing and caring about what motivates people and what is important to them, and helping them fulfill those aspirations at work. This, he says, is a foundation of leadership. (2)

Fear constrains behavior. Love liberates it. So, if all you need is compliance, fear will probably do. But fear freezes initiative, stifles creativity, and provides no incentive to stretch and grow. Love is about wanting and allowing people to be at their best, and engaging with them to help them achieve that. “Love is the selfless promotion of the growth of the other,” is Milton Mayeroff’s definition. (3)

Sharing knowledge, looking after employees’ wellbeing, giving people your time and attention, respecting and acknowledging the contribution of others, all are incontrovertible aspects of good leadership. It only becomes controversial when the ‘L’ word is applied.

Jim Clemmer, a Canadian leadership thinker I admire, gets to the heart of the matter with this insight: "Leadership is emotional. Leadership deals with feelings. Leadership is made up of dreams, inspiration, excitement, desire, pride, care, passion, and love. The areas of our lives where we show the strongest leadership - including our communities, families, organizations, products, services, hobbies, and customers - are where we're most in love." (4)

I think even the most emotionally reserved leader can, at a push, understand the definition of love put forward by Colonel Collins, above. But, being ‘in love’ or even ‘madly in love’ as Clemmer and Blanchard put it, is still a step too far for many managers.

If you include yourself among those who find ‘love’ a hard word to link with ‘leadership’, because ‘love’ is personal, soft, emotional and gets in the way of hard-nosed high performance, then remember this: Herb Kelleher’s Southwest Airlines, the company he declared from the start to be ‘led by love’, whose headquarters is called ‘Love Airfield’ and whose stock market listing is ‘Luv’ is the most profitable airline in US commercial aviation history and its stock market valuation is higher than that of every other US airline put together.

USEFUL CONCEPT: Transformational vs Transactional Leadership: “I ask people all the time, ‘Would you rather be magnificent or ordinary at work?’ Everyone chooses magnificent. I don't get anyone choosing ordinary. And yet, do we regularly get magnificent behavior at work? No we don’t. I think that's because of the way we treat people.’” In that quote, Ken Blanchard is explaining how a transformational leader works, and that requires love. If you are purely a transactional leader – negotiating performance in return for a material reward – love is not necessary, some would argue. Equally, however, ordinary people are unlikely to be inspired to extraordinary performance levels by transactional leadership alone

News: Nigerian student, Olaolu Femi, face life imprisonm...

News: Nigerian student, Olaolu Femi, face life imprisonm...: African Outlook gathered that the Nigerian identified as Olaolu Sunkanmi Femi and one of his friends were physically attacked in front ...

Appreciating the Importance of Leadership

Why is Leadership so Important?

Understanding the importance of leadership is the key to your business success.

Leadership has so much influence in our lives because so often it determines whether we enjoy a particular experience.

A leader is anyone who inspires and influences people to accomplish organizational goals; they motivate others to pursue actions, focus thinking, and shape decisions for the greater good of the organization.

Since we spend the majority of our day participating in some event influenced by a coach, teacher, or other leader, the person in charge has a significant impact on the experience.

Consider any new activity or recall youth sports. The ability of the coach (leader) to inspire and motivate influences our interest and desire to stay involved.

When leaders are passionate and influence us in a positive way, we get excited and want to continue our involvement.

How important is leadership to you? Life is short -- why participate in an activity if we don't enjoy it, and if we participate, why not do so with all of our energy?

Leadership is about communicating and building teams so that everyone works together. The importance of leadership is a key ingredient to successful businesses and championship teams. Teams that have this synergy tend to be the ones on top.

Can you learn to lead?

The short answer is yes. It is hard work, but much easier if you are willing to set aside your ego, serve others, and strive to make your organization a better place than when you arrived.

Find a good example; a coach, a teacher, or someone who made an impression on you as an effective great leader. Read everything you can about successful leaders with these key areas in mind and consider the following questions:

Leader

A leader is someone you trust and is knowledgeable, but not all knowing; speaks with purpose, but listens well; sets the example and lives the corporate values everyone is expected to follow.

Why do some people attract followers and others do not?

Can you learn to attract followers?

Teamwork

Teamwork establishes an environment that allows everyone to feel that they can be a part of something greater.

What is the importance of teamwork in your business?

Do you feel you are in an environment where you will be able to learn and grow?

Communication

Communication is about creating new or better awareness; achieving a common understanding.

What is the importance of communication in your business?

Does your team share the same values and support a common vision?

Leadership is a continual journey. When you understand the importance of leadership, you seek ways to improve and build teams who communicate well.

If You Want a Team of Leaders You Must Become One First

John Maxwell, a top author on leadership, wrote "The number one motivational principle in the world is: people do what people see." So if you want a team of leaders you must first become one yourself.

Many people believe that leaders are not made they are born. While it's true that some people seem to be born with leadership traits, it's more common for leadership skills and abilities to be developed. Research Abraham Lincoln's career and you'll find a great example of that.

But where do you start? Great leaders are generally great communicators. This doesn't necessarily mean that they are great orators though. To be a good communicator you must first be a good listener.

There is not one person who does not appreciate a leader who will take the time to listen to what they have to sy. It's very motivational when someone gives you that respect and that respect is usually reciprocated. Great leadership starts here.

Great leaders take responsibility and hold others accountable. Any kind of team thrives when they know the "buck stops at the leader" and that the leader will insist the team members meet the set standards.

The best way to develop future leaders is to hold them accountable for their actions and to not accept any less than what's expected. Of course as the leader you have to hold yourself to the same expectations. For example, it's hard to expect others to be on time for meetings if you're not.

The best leaders get people involved in what is going on and then empower them to play a role in problem solving and becoming successful. When you show confidence in your team by seeking their contribution you build a sense of pride that enables you to reach the shared goals quicker.

In the book The One Minute Manager, the number one motivator of people is "Feedback on results. It's what keeps us going." Great leaders understand this and make sure that the team is always aware of where they stand.

When goals are set, a plan that includes a time frame to achieve it is put in place. When you give your team consistent updates on how they're doing you're giving the necessary information to keep them on target.

It wouldn't be fair to notify an employee at the end of the year that he didn't receive his bonus if he was never given any progress reports long the way. Great leaders communicate and give their team members opportunities for success.

They also give them opportunities to fail. Leaders understand the importance of that. This is how we learn best. They're there to help pick them and dust them off, too.

The True Meaning Of Leadership

What does leadership mean to you? Leadership is more than some fancy title. It has little to do with who you are. A leader stands out from the crowd and shines in all they do, from the way the person talks, looks and acts. A great leader lives with integrity; they are congruent in words and in actions, honest, trustworthy, authentic and compassionate. If you want to be a leader others wish to follow, you have to become the leader that you would follow. Here are a few ideas to keep in mind to develop and become the leader others want to follow.

A Leader knows it's about the people and not about themselves. Lead from the front. It's important to focus on the people you sponsor and what they desire. Learn to do less telling what to do, and start asking more questions to learn more about them. You can learn a lot about a person by asking questions. Do more listening than talking, to really find the problems, so you can find solutions for the problems, and give solid advice.

A leader inspires trust and action. One of the best things about being a leader is the privilege to share goals and dreams with members on your team. You can lead others with your words and actions, and earn your members trust, and inspire them to build their business and develop their skills. Your own actions inspire your members to believe in themselves and accelerate.

A leader is also out in the trenches doing it every day. When your people see you out actually doing what you're advising them to do, they will then have more respect and trust in what you have to say. Lead by example, people believe what they see, not what they hear.

A leader offers the team hope and inspiration. Decide today to be the leader that offers a positive experience, and make a great difference in someone's life. When you do, you will also see a change in your own life. Start today to give hope to those who have no faith, offer encouragement to those who are afraid, inspire others by helping them discover their talents.

A leader helps the team plan for success. It is impossible to know what direction to take, and how to know when you have reached your goals without a plan. A map to see which direction and steps to take is essential to success. You have to decide where you are now in your life, and where you want to be. This is what leaders do for their team. Help them map out a plan for action. Leaders teach the team goal setting techniques, and how to develop a strategic plan for daily, weekly, monthly, and annual plans of action to help the team reach goals faster.

You will reap the financial rewards, and see the profound effect you have that empowers those around you; when you are a leader who strives to help members be the best they can be. You will see your team blossom and shine, and become a true leader others will follow.

The Power of Service.

When you think of the word “serve”, what comes to mind? Do you think of a waitress, butler or some other form of pleasing others? Do you think of leaders? If not, you should. The truth is responsible leaders are servants. “Servants to whom?” you may ask. Servants to your team, that’s who and to take it a step further; your organization.

The real question is not to whom, but how. How can you lead responsibly and still serve your team (as if leading is not hard enough)? In order for you to be a responsible leader, you have to recognize that there are 2 key tasks you must fulfill.

The vision and the execution.

It is your responsibility to communicate what the organization stands for and wants to accomplish. Just as kids look to their parents and players look to their coaches, people are looking to you (their leader) for guidance and vision. In this role of a visionary, you are behaving like a responsible leader.

Now that they know where they are going, people will now look to you (the leader) to fulfill the second task of responsible leadership. The Execution! How will you get the team to the finish line? I’ll tell you how. You will become a bridge builder. As a responsible leader you will try to find out what makes people perform well and bridge the gap between their performance and your vision. That’s when you begin to make positive impacts on the lives of those around you. When you make an impact on your team, you are making an impact on the entire organization as well.

So you see; it’s not that bad. As responsible leaders you understand that the only way to truly have an impact on any organization is to serve the people in that organization. You know that it is your responsibility to leave the organization better off than before you arrived on the scene. You are there to service your team and to build bridges.

The type of bridge you will build is totally up to you.

Manifesting Your Desires

As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he." That's an ancient proverb which made its way into the biblical New Testament, and then in the 19th century CE partly became the title of one of the first self-help and abundance-manifestation books: 'As a Man Thinketh'. Needless to say, it goes for women, too!

But what does it mean? It means that your life is the way it is because of the streams of consciousness that you allow to flow through your mind and cut meanders into your subconscious mind (the "heart"). Yes, you are responsible for your life. Now, this fact makes some people feel overjoyed with new-found liberty when they learn of it; but for most people, at first there is incredulity or even resentment, anger, and fear. If their lives are not where they want them to be, or even presently tragic, they don't want to hear that they're basically responsible for it. They want to hear that they are victims, or they weren't fated to have what they want, or life is unfair and they got the short end of the stick from birth.

Now, this is not to be taken to mean that every single bad thing that has happened to you was "caused" by you. If someone is cruel to you, they choose to be cruel to you, and you cannot help but to feel their cruelty. This is not your fault. However, if someone is cruel to you and you allow that to wreck your self-esteem or become an obstacle to your personal journey, progress, success, and dream fulfillment, then that IS your fault--even if you never knew it before now.

It's a simple "cosmic law" called Like Attracts Like. Successful people throughout time have used this law to their advantage, even if they didn't realize they were doing so. The ways in which you habitually feel and think inevitably create your reality for you. Champion athletes are not people who never lose--they are people who NEVER IMAGINE losing, even if they just did lose. They are champions because of more than their talents and training, for the losers have that, too.

How can you make this law work for you? Well, one of the best ways is by using affirmations--these are commands passed down from your conscious mind to your subconscious mind to bring about a desired result. However, many people nowadays have heard about affirmations, tried to use them, and failed. This is because most people who try them don't use affirmations correctly, and this is because they are not taught correctly.

1) No affirmations can be lies. The subconscious mind demands evidence--it won't accept lies. If you are broke and want to be wealthy, but you state an affirmation of "I am abundantly wealthy", you can forget about having that money. It's a lie! So how could you make it so that the subconscious mind accepts the reality of you having wealth? Try this: every time you go to make a purchase, as you are preparing to pay say to yourself, "I always have more than enough money." As long as you have at least $1 left over after your purchase, you have told the truth. Once you've done this just a few times, your subconscious mind will begin reaching out into the universal energy to get you more and more money to spend.

2) All of your affirmations must be open-ended. You aren't living outside of time and place, and you cannot box in the universe. You have to let yourself be taken by surprise with how your desires and needs are met. Never demand that the universe bring you your result in such-and-such a way and don't give it a time frame (you can assume that the delivery of your desire will be timely).

3) Make some of your affirmations comparative. Say, "I am growing wealthier and wealthier." After all, you don't want any cosmically imposed ceiling on how wealthy you can get, do you?

4) All affirmations must be personal. Even if you are seeking the love of someone, an affirmation is not a magic love potion. You only have control over you; everyone else is just as free as you are. But, you can choose to affirm, "I choose to feel that Angela loves me." You can also use the phrase that you choose to do or have or feel something to avoid telling lies about what you "already have" that you don't already have.

So, these are some of the effective ways that you can make the Law of Attraction work for you and realize your dreams.

Learning from Nelson Mandela's leadership style.

Happy 94th Birthday to the Madiba of Africa.

After 27 years of incarceration on Robben Island, hard labor and mistreatment at the hands of his white prison guards, Mandela became the first black President of South Africa and abandoned apartheid.

The courage, vision and fortitude of this man are legend.  But today I would like to look at four of Nelson Mandela’s leadership skills and provide a compelling argument for why the world needs these leadership skills today.


1. Lead From the Back

As a boy, Mandela was greatly influenced by Jongintaba, the tribal king who raised him. When Jongintaba had meetings of his court, the men gathered in a circle, and only after all had spoken did the king begin to speak. The chief’s job, Mandela said, was not to tell people what to do but to form a consensus. “Don’t enter the debate too early,” he used to say.

I think that more than ever before, people now want to be recognized for the value they bring to the table.  They want to be heard.  And they want their leaders to listen!   This means that if leaders are going to move in sync with where the people are, they will need to remember Mandela’s words when reminiscing about his boyhood and herding cattle. “You know,” he would say, “you can only lead them from behind.”

2. Lead with the Knowledge that ‘Nothing is Black or White.

Mandela acted on the belief that life is never either-or; right or wrong; black or white.  He understood that decisions are complex; that there are always competing and complicating factors; that nothing is ever as straightforward as it appears; that the leader does not have all the answers or the best answer.

Think about how dramatically our worlds have changed today. What we took for granted as being our reality is no longer the same.  Everyone is loudly expressing their different needs, feelings and perceptions.  More than ever leaders need to think like Mandela – they need to be comfortable with contradiction; they must be able to listen and they must invite authentic dialogue and debate. When they do these leaders will not fall into either-or thinking and will make profoundly and fundamentally better decisions.

3. Quitting is Leading Too

Knowing how to abandon something that is not working, a failed idea, goal or relationship is often the most difficult kind of decision a leaderHolding on too tightly to outdated goals has to make. This takes enormous courage.  In the history of Africa, there have been only a handful of democratically elected leaders who willingly stood down from office and did not hold the country hostage.  Mandela was determined to set a precedent for all who followed him by choosing to set the course but not steering the ship forever.   He understood that leaders lead as much by what they choose not to do as by what they choose to do.

We are seeing leaders in business and government in Nigeria today, who are holding on tightly to outmoded goals,policies, approaches and opinions.  It is time for such leaders to catch up with how the world has changed, listen to the people, and change their perspectives accordingly – or else make way for those who can.

4. Be Humble about your strengths and honest about your flaws.

Mandela had a deep understanding of himself.  He knew that although he was a great leader, he was also a man of flesh and blood; of weaknesses and flaws.  He was willing to own up to his flaws and worked hard at triumphing over them.  He also understood his weaknesses and found ways to make sure that he compensated for them.

We don’t see a whole lot of this kind of honesty and humility in too many leaders today.  What we do see a lot of is leaders who choose not to look in the mirror and as a result are in denial about the fact that their weaknesses are getting in the way of real change and progress.

Would you agree that the world would be a better place today if the bulk of those who call themselves leaders applied Mandela’s leadership gifts? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Lead with Guiding Values.

Wise leaders create guiding values for themselves and the organizations they lead. These values form the foundation for the organization's culture and function as a guiding light for coworkers, helping them make correct decisions and work toward common goals.

These values are best reflected in time-tested principles, which are deep, fundamental truths with universal application. These truths address laws that are as firm in "human physics" as the law of gravitation is in natural physics. For example, the law of gravity says that if you drop an object from the roof of a building it will fall to the ground. We know, with absolute certainty that this will happen every time we do it and we don't question it. This law is true. It is real. In the same way these human truths are equally reliable. They are not only a set of values, but they are the foundations of human effectiveness and interaction.

When leaders align with universal principles such as trustworthiness, respect, responsibility, honesty, compassion, excellence and perseverance they create the conditions for long-lasting success, fulfillment, happiness, a meaningful life, a life of contribution.

King Solomon, a leader synonymous with wisdom, says: "A good man is guided by his honesty."

Leaders have to be clever and competent, but they must also have sound values and a powerful sense of integrity. In good times as well as bad the most effective leaders stay true to their unique set of values. They do what is right and tell the truth in all areas of life. That doesn't say they are perfect or that the struggle to be true to themselves and their values isn't a life-long journey. And it's not just in the major decisions that this quality is needed; integrity in little things is equally important. There are no degrees of integrity. You either have it or you don't.

We value honesty more than any other virtue and we appreciate people who represent a strong value system. If we are to follow someone, whether it is in business, school, or politics, we want to feel faith and confidence in that person.

Solomon says: "It is far better not to say you'll do something than to say you will and then not do it."

We expect our leaders to set a good example and act in an exemplary and positive way. Effective leaders live as they learn through acting in accordance with vision and values. As the saying goes: Our actions speak louder than words. That our words and deeds are aligned constitutes the basis for credibility of leadership.

Wise leaders set a good example by acting in accordance with higher values. Those values permeate their behavior and promote confidence. They range from creating good relations to fully completing tasks. Quality and creativity are the key words.

What the leader spends time on and pays attention to counts. Wise leaders deliberately devote time to the group's viability and development. Supporting both the group and the individual becomes the norm. When people in the group see that words and deeds are consistent, this creates credibility. And it is through being credible that a leader can encourage a long-term commitment from the group.

Solomon says:"Without wise leadership, a nation is in trouble; but with good counselors there is safety."

Wise leaders understand their role of creating the arena for their employee's success. Such an arena makes it possible for the employees to feel inspired, challenged and that they are working towards an exciting future. It makes it possible to interact in a winning way in relation to their surroundings.

We as individuals are unique and at the same time complementary. To develop fully, we need supportive leadership. Some leaders create "leadership by enthusiasm" when facing a task with themselves at the center. Others lead by providing a clear picture of the situation and opportunities available in it. Still others have a more methodical, step by step manner of leading the group. A wise leader provides a sense of continuity for the group and defines limits that all have to comply with - especially the leader him/herself - regardless of their leadership style.

Solomon says: "Whatever you do, do well."

We all possess a greater potential within us. The question is where do we find the situation and the people that can bring out this greater good. "How can I create my future" and "How can I lift those around me" will be the key questions for enhanced leadership.

Wise leaders realize that there is only one way to go. It is to deepen one's own awareness of and confidence in the future. The responsibility that lies before us as leaders is to always operate for the good, for a better future, and a better world. This is a deep understanding of and commitment to the values that possess a weight and validity beyond one's own self, and which gives life greater quality and larger dimensions.

Character Is What You Need To Be Successful

The world is filled with people who make lots of wealth in questionable ways -- drug dealers, con artists, dishonest business men, politicians on the take, and so on. If you measure success simply by how much money you make, then you must realize that people who accumulate riches in a dishonest manner lack something that is the true mark of success -- character and integrity.

No amount of wealth can compensate for a lack of character. Character equals integrity and integrity means you always do what is right -- even when no one is watching you. It means that fear and guilt are all but eliminated from your life because you have nothing to hide and nothing to hold you back from achieving success in the true definition of the word.

In a practical sense, this means you practice the "golden rule" by doing unto others as you would have them do unto you. In your daily life, there are numerous opportunities for you to make this rule a part of your routine. Think about it. Have you ever been tempted to shortcut your way to the top of the corporate ladder? Reaching this goal is a wonderful achievement, but take a look around you. Are the hallways in your office building stacked high with the bodies of people you stepped on in order to get there? If so, be prepared to get stepped on in return.

Do you routinely treat people with honesty and respect? Or do you have a short temper when it comes to dealing with people who refuse to bow down to your every wish and command? The person with character and integrity will never have to worry about this because they know that no one achieves success single-handedly. Whether it's success in the business world or sports or family life, someone was probably there to offer a helping hand somewhere along the way. The person with character and integrity will know and appreciate this and offer the same helping hand when the opportunity arises.

Celebrated portrait photographer, Yousuf Karsh, was famous for photographing celebrities and world leaders. He explained, "I have found that great people do have in common an immense belief in themselves and their mission. They also have great determination as well as an ability to work hard. At the crucial moment of decision, they draw upon their accumulated wisdom. Above all, they have integrity."

It is important that you take a good look at your attitude regarding what success means to you. Albert Einstein said, "Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character."

Character is what you are. Success is what you achieve. What you achieve can be large or small, but success without character and integrity is merely a shadow. Your character is the key to success and it is the attribute you will pass on to your children. So let your strength of character shine through in all you do and say and you will truly be able to achieve meaningful success in life.

Success Through Recognizing Failure

Recognizing failure is one of the best ways to grow. If you ignore your failures, it is unlikely that you will ever be able to develop the skills necessary to make up for your deficiencies.

By recognizing your failures, you are better able to understand yourself. Also by treating each and every failure as a learning experience, you can make failure a positive experience. This doesn't mean that you will want to fail, but by turning failure into something good, you can reduce the pain of failure.

Since many individuals avoid action because they are afraid of failure, taking steps toward minimizing your fear of failure can give you an advantage over others who have not learned to benefit from their mistakes. Fear of failure is one of the biggest reasons people don't strive for greatness. By recognizing that failure is just part of the learning process, individuals can overcome one of the biggest roadblocks to success.

Risk is a natural part of success. Risk doesn't mean doing something stupid. Risk means attempting something that stretches you beyond what you know you can succeed at. This type of risk helps you to grow. By developing a healthy attitude toward failure, the fear of risk is lowered which encourages people to attempt things that will contribute to their success.

Take the time to recognize all of your failures. Don't simply gloss over them. Take the time to reflect on what went wrong and how you could have handled the situation differently. By doing this you will be able to grow in a way that many individuals avoid. This growth can set you apart from the average person and turn your failures into successes in the future. Failures are inevitable, but you have a choice on what you do with the failure. You can let it destroy you or use it as a springboard to make yourself stronger than before.

Distinguish Your Leadership.

What do you think of when you think of leadership? Do you consider yourself a leader in any aspect of your life? What does it mean to be a leader? What type of leader are you?

There are many different theories about what it takes to be an effective leader; from the charismatic extrovert who commands attention whenever he or she speaks, to the soft-spoken introvert who prefers to empower others from the sideline.

Despite what you've been told, and despite how you may view your own leadership abilities (or lack thereof), you truly are a leader. Stake your claim to what is yours.

It's very empowering to acknowledge, celebrate, and truly own all of the aspects of our existence. And each of us is a leader on some level: at home, at work, in the community... through formal or informal roles. Whether a CEO or a stay-at-home parent, we all have the ability to inspire others and create action through our ideas, words, and examples.

Of course we can't all be leaders in all areas - but we can claim the leadership responsibilities that have already been bestowed upon us: if you're a parent, then you're a leader. If others often come to you for feedback or advice, you're a leader. You're a leader if you can think beyond the minutiae and the mundane, and if you're able to assess challenges as opportunities.

We can claim our leadership in any area in which we feel a sense of passion and investment: wherever we care deeply enough to develop our knowledge, self-evaluate and grow, and challenge ourselves and others to strive for something better.

Try expanding your own concept of leadership, and seize the opportunity to stake your claim. You may already be the top dog at work - but how can you bring a more positive influence to your children? Or you may possess no formal title at all - but where can you share your unique knowledge, experience, talent, and wisdom? Where can you influence a change in your world (no matter how small), and inspire those around you to do the same?

You are a leader. Wear it proudly. Positive change is desperately needed on all levels, grand and small - from the political arena, to the boardroom, to the living room. And each of us can embrace the privilege, right, and responsibility to make it happen!

Young Leaders read and always have enough to motivate you for the CHANGE ahead.

                   

“Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other.”
- Abraham Lincoln

“Don’t worry when you are not recognized, but strive to be worthy of recognition.”
- Abraham Lincoln

“We should be too big to take offense and too noble to give it.”
- Abraham Lincoln

“Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.”
- Albert Einstein

“Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.”
- Albert Einstein

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.”
- Anne Frank

“Focusing your life solely on making a buck shows a certain poverty of ambition. It asks too little of yourself. Because it’s only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you realize your true potential.”
-Barack Obama

“If you’re walking down the right path and you’re willing to keep walking, eventually you’ll make progress.”
-Barack Obama

“When people go to work, they shouldn’t have to leave their hearts at home.”
- Betty Bender

“If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito.”
- Betty Reese

“If I were given the opportunity to present a gift to the next generation, it would be the ability for each individual to learn to laugh at himself.”
- Charles M. Schulz

“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better.  It’s not.”
- Dr. Seuss

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”
- e. e. cummings

“The leadership instinct you are born with is the backbone. You develop the funny bone and the wishbone that go with it.”
- Elaine Agather

“Self-development is a higher duty than self-sacrifice.”
- Elizabeth Cady Stanton

“Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it.”
- Ella Williams

“I know the price of success: dedication, hard work, and an unremitting devotion to the things you want to see happen”
- Frank Lloyd Wright

”The important work of moving the world forward does not wait to be done by perfect men.”
- George Eliot

“I found that the men and women who got to the top were those who did the jobs they had in hand, with everything they had of energy and enthusiasm and hard work.”
- Harry S. Truman

“Do not hire a man who does your work for money, but him who does it for love of it.”
- Henry David Thoreau

“If the laborer gets no more than the wages which his employer pays him, he is cheated, he cheats himself.”
- Henry David Thoreau

“Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it.”
- Henry David Thoreau

“When a dog runs at you, whistle for him”
- Henry David Thoreau

“Goodness is the only investment that never fails.”
- Henry David Thoreau

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”
- John Quincy Adams

“Each of us has a spark of life inside us, and our highest endeavor ought to be to set off that spark in one another.”
- Kenny Ausubel

“What should young people do with their lives today? Many things, obviously. But the most daring thing is to create stable communities in which the terrible disease of loneliness can be cured.”
- Kurt Vonnegut

“A man’s character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation.
- Mark Twain

“I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catchers mitt on both hands.  You need to be able to throw something back.”
- Maya Angelou

“The world belongs to the energetic.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Enthusiasm is the mother of effort, and without it nothing great was ever achieved.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Do not be too timid and squeamish about your reactions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Few will have the greatness to bend history itself; but each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the total of all those acts will be written the history of this generation.”
- Robert F. Kennedy

“Each generation goes further than the generation preceding it because it stands on the shoulders of that generation. You will have opportunities beyond anything we’ve ever known.”
- Ronald Reagan

“Find a need and fill it.”
- Ruth Stafford Peale

“We can always live on less when we have more to live for.”
- S. Stephen McKenney

“We must remember that one determined person can make a significant difference, and that a small group of determined people can change the course of history.”
- Sonia Johnson

“Far and away the best prize that life offers is the chance to work hard at work worth doing.”
- Theodore Roosevelt

“Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.”
-Thomas Edison

“I’m a great believer in luck and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it.”
- Thomas Jefferson

“Leaders are people who do the right thing; managers are people who do things right.”
- Warren G. Bennis

The nature and meaning of leadership is changing in response to a dramatically changing society, and the rise of complex challenges.

 Leadership is increasingly seen as situational and as an inherently collaborative, social and relational activity. Because of this, the social and emotional skills or competencies that foster and build interpersonal relationships – such as relationship management and communication, self-discipline, flexibility, creativity, and emotional intelligence – are crucial. The field of leadership has much to offer in terms of helping build up young people’s skills and capacities in order to make positive contributions to their communities, alongside building their employ-ability skills

• Providing young people with the opportunity to develop and exercise leadership can have benefits
for the individual young person, their peer group and society more broadly. 

The emotional and social skills that enable effective leadership have broader significance beyond their potential to prepare young people to take on formal leadership roles; these skills are crucial to young people’s successful transition to adulthood. Additionally, youth leadership can serve as a vehicle for tackling
pressing social challenges and catalysing positive social change

• Unresolved debates on some key issues may impede the development of the field. 

These include debates around the relationship between authority and leadership; a reliance on deficit models
of youth leadership, and questions surrounding the distinction between ‘youth’ and ‘adult’ leadership
respectively; the use of the language of ‘leadership’ among practitioners; and ongoing debates
around whether leadership is inherent, versus something that can be developed

• There is a wide debate around what youth leadership is, and how best to develop young people’s
leadership skills. Based on our research and consultations, we have proposed a definition of youth
leadership:   ‘Young people empowered to inspire and mobilise themselves and others towards a
common purpose, in response to personal and/or social issues and challenges, to effect
positive change’

• While there is no single model for effective practice, there are certain ingredients that are common to
successful leadership programmes.  Effective practice includes opportunities that engage young people in challenging action, around issues that reflect their genuine needs and offer authentic opportunities to make decisions and effect change, in an environment of support in which young people can reflect on their experiences. Opportunities should be sustainable to ensure that young people can carry their leadership skills into adulthood, and this should include clear progression routes and appropriate support at all stages.

Embedding youth leadership into organisational cultures and structures can further promote youth
leadership development.  Meaningful power-sharing among adults and young people can, however, be difficult to achieve. ‘Youth-driven’ models of organisation can yield the most comprehensive results, in terms of empowering participants as well as benefits for the organisation – but can be time-consuming and difficult to sustain. Generating organisational commitment to youth-centred structures and processes poses a significant challenge

: Addressing new challenges facing young people in Nigeria.

Young people in Nigeria today are growing up with ideals, expectations, ambitions and talents which are unprecedented, driven by new technology, affluence and globalisation.

 As a nation, we have an abundance of strong organisations engaged in youth leadership. In recent years, there have been extraordinarily creative experiments, many of them led by young people. However, young people face new kinds of social challenges in a more complex world – a world that is more diverse, with increased pressures on families, greater caring responsibilities (including for the young), more intense pressure from markets, and employability and skills challenges.

It is also a time when millions of young people are aware as never before of the scale of the leadership challenges we now face at a global scale from climate change to ageing to inequality. Many of these challenges and pressures are predicted to increase in scale and intensity as a consequence of the economic downturn. For our nation to succeed, we need to invest in young people’s skills and capabilities to act as powerful advocates and agents of change to help society meet these challenges.

Yet, in many communities, talent continues to go to waste: thousands of young people face acute difficulties in making the transition to adulthood, and public perceptions of young people can often be negative, reinforced by unfavourable media portrayals, with young people often being perceived as part of the problem rather than the solution and, at worst, viewed with fear and suspicion.

These negative perceptions mask the extraordinarily positive work in which young people are engaged – whether in the private or public sphere (through volunteering, caring, carrying out youth work and a host of other positive activities)

Young people are still denied adequate representation in the places where power is exercised, from Parliament and local councils to businesses and voluntary organisations. Only 0.3% of councillors are under 251. Young people from minority ethnic backgrounds face further barriers which also require closer attention (especially in the light of growing challenges around radicalisation and far-right extremism).

After the 2007 general election, the average age of an MP was 50.6 years,  In local government, the position is hardly better: the average age of councillors is 58, and less than 2% are under 30, while 29% of councillors are women, now local councils elections are no longer conducted by various state governments.

Many leadership positions – whether in politics, quangos or boards of charities, schools and hospitals have become increasingly professionalised, thereby making it increasingly difficult  for non-professionals  and young people to participate in these institutions.

Understanding what kinds of activities and programmes can inspire, motivate and mobilise a new generation of young people to engage in the democratic process and contribute to their community is vital to sustaining a healthy democracy.

one of the most crucial roles of political parties in the past was to develop successive generations of leaders, providing them with the skills and confidence to campaign and govern; many young people learned more through party activism than through formal education. This role has atrophied in recent years, in part because of increasing professionalisation in the world of work and political life.  

Educational qualifications tend now to be the most important determinant of attainment later in life, while the role of judgment and life experience are nowadays given less weight relative to paper qualifications and professionalism.

Party politics, aligned as it is to this set of values, has ceased to engage a broad range of young people in its activities, and party leadership has become increasingly less representative – particularly of low-income groups without affluent or politically engaged family and community networks, educational opportunities and political power.

The routes that once helped to find and nurture leaders from different backgrounds such as the trade unions and churches alongside mass political parties – are no longer working.

Building the skills and capacities of young people to take up leadership roles in their communities is vital for democracy.

There is also strong evidence supporting the notion of a ‘democratic deficit’ among young people:

Notably, young people display low levels of trust in politicians and political institutions and evidence little inclination to join formal political organisations or to get involved in local politics.

While young people remain attached to voting as a civic right and responsibility, voting levels among young people are low and are projected to remain so.

There is also little evidence that young people are choosing more informal or non-traditional forms of civic and civil participation in large numbers (e.g. participation in activities such as protests, and interest in community issues).

Beyond the political arena, further pressing challenges are affecting young people. Labour market statistics show that unemployment for 18- to 24-year-olds was 676,000 in the three months to December 2011, up 60,000 from the three months to 2012. Youth unemployment is rising more quickly than unemployment for any other group and is forecast to exceed 2 million during 2018. Those under 25 thus appear to be bearing significant pressures as a consequence of this process.

Sustained unemployment while young, especially of long duration, is especially damaging.

By preventing labour market entrants from gaining a foothold in employment, sustained youth unemployment may reduce their productivity. Those that suffer youth unemployment tend to have lower incomes and poorer labour market experiences in later decades.

Unemployment while young creates permanent scars rather than temporary blemishes.

Not only this, but poor employment outcomes are related to increased criminal activity, reduced health outcomes and lower educational outcomes among offspring.

Unemployment and underemployment are quickly becoming more than a temporary problem, with many young people leaving school, college and university without jobs, or being fired from jobs in the first round of cuts. Many others simply do not have the skills and qualifications that employers want.

Economic woes quickly turn into social challenges. The number of children in custody has increased by 8% between 2010 and 2012. As of April 2011, more than 3,000 children were in jail, with further increases expected. According to Children and Young People in Custody 2010, one in three young people in prison has a history of care, and 86% of young men have been excluded from schools.

This source also cites a disproportionate number of no-educated young people in custody, with 29% of young men and 23% of young women coming from these backgrounds. Additionally, a quarter of young offenders under 17 have literacy and numeracy levels equal to an average seven-year old child.

This number is higher and increasing among young BME offenders. These statistics and research from the Department for Children, Schools and Families suggest that jobs and education are a critical part of reducing reoffending and preventing anti-social behaviour.